When a dysfunctional family teaches you to question your own pain, learning to trust yourself becomes an act of recovery. There comes a point in healing when you realize something that should have been obvious all along. Being hurt by someone’s hurtful behavior does not make you crazy. Being angry…
Narcissistic Abuse Recovery
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Adult Children of Narcissists - Adverse Childhood Experiences - Boundaries - Breaking the Cycle - cPTSD - cPTSD Healing - Emotional Abuse - Generational Trauma - Late Discovery - Narcissistic Abuse Recovery - Narcissistic Parent - No Contact - Recovery - Survivor - Trauma
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Adult Children of Narcissists - Adverse Childhood Experiences - Breaking the Cycle - cPTSD - cPTSD Healing - Emotional Abuse - Financial Abuse - Gen X - Generational Trauma - Hypervigilance - Identity Betrayal - Late Discovery - Narcissistic Abuse Recovery - Narcissistic Parent - Survivor - Trauma
The Mom-pocalypse, Part One: The Family Fiction Network
How a DNA test, a long-lost father, and one remarkable case of selective amnesia began dismantling nearly five decades of family history. There are moments in life when you realize that everything you thought you knew might be complete bullshit. For some people, it’s discovering their spouse has been cheating.…
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Adult Children of Narcissists - Adverse Childhood Experiences - Breaking the Cycle - cPTSD Healing - Generational Trauma - Identity Betrayal - Late Discovery - Narcissistic Abuse Recovery - Narcissistic Parent - No Contact - Recovery - Survivor - Trauma
What Would My Tears Say If They Could Talk?
I came across this question recently: What would my tears say if they could talk? And the longer I sat with it, the more I realized mine would probably have a lot to say. They’ve been around for a long time. Some of them existed before I even understood why.…
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Adult Children of Narcissists - Adverse Childhood Experiences - Boundaries - Breaking the Cycle - cPTSD - cPTSD Healing - Gen X - Generational Trauma - Gratitude - Narcissistic Abuse Recovery - Narcissistic Parent - No Contact - Recovery - Substance Abuse - Survivor - Trauma - Triggers
I Grew Anyway
I was walking past this tree recently when something about it stopped me. At first, it was the shape. You don’t need to be an arborist to look at those enormous bends in the trunk and realize that this tree did not grow according to plan. Something happened. Maybe the…
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Adult Children of Narcissists - Adverse Childhood Experiences - Boundaries - Breaking the Cycle - cPTSD - cPTSD Healing - Gen X - Generational Trauma - Gratitude - Late Discovery - Narcissistic Abuse Recovery - Narcissistic Parent - No Contact - Recovery - Survivor - Trauma
Two Years No Contact — I’d Still Choose It Again
Two years ago today, August 29, 2024, I went No Contact with my mother. I wish I could tell you that exactly two years later everything is rainbows, bubblegum, and unicorns. It isn’t. I haven’t reached some magical point where none of it hurts anymore. I don’t wake up every…
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Adult Children of Narcissists - Adverse Childhood Experiences - Boundaries - Breaking the Cycle - cPTSD - cPTSD Healing - Emotional Abuse - Generational Trauma - Identity Betrayal - Late Discovery - Narcissistic Abuse Recovery - Narcissistic Parent - No Contact - Recovery - Survivor - Trauma
What Is My Sacrifice?
Why Luthen Rael’s Monologue Hits Differently as I Approach Two Years No Contact August 29 is getting closer. Two years. Two years since I went No Contact with my toxic mother. Two years since my son and I pointed ourselves west and left that twisted dysfuction behind. Two years since…
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Adult Children of Narcissists - Adverse Childhood Experiences - Boundaries - Breaking the Cycle - cPTSD - cPTSD Healing - Emotional Abuse - Gen X - Generational Trauma - Hypervigilance - Music as a Mirror - Narcissistic Abuse Recovery - Narcissistic Parent - No Contact - Recovery - Survivor - Trauma
Music as a Mirror: “Just Like You” by Three Days Grace
There’s a particular fear that follows many survivors of narcissistic or emotionally abusive parents into adulthood: What if I become just like them? We recognize their anger in our own temper. We hear their sharpness in something we say during an argument. We catch ourselves becoming cold, defensive, controlling, or…
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Adult Children of Narcissists - Adverse Childhood Experiences - Boundaries - Breaking the Cycle - cPTSD - cPTSD Healing - Empty Nest - Gen X - Generational Trauma - Gratitude - Narcissistic Abuse Recovery - Recovery - Survivor - Trauma
Turns Out Parenting Doesn’t Get Easier at 18—It Unlocks Hard Mode.
If you’ve ever played a video game, you know how it works. You spend hours learning the mechanics, figuring out the controls, beating increasingly difficult levels… and just when you think you’ve gotten pretty good at the game… Congratulations. Hard Mode unlocked. That’s parenting. People always tell you how hard…
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Adult Children of Narcissists - Adverse Childhood Experiences - Boundaries - Breaking the Cycle - cPTSD - cPTSD Healing - Gen X - Generational Trauma - Gratitude - Late Discovery - Narcissistic Abuse Recovery - No Contact - Recovery - Survivor - Trauma
When Nothing Explodes…
It’s been almost a month since my last post. A few years ago, I would have felt guilty about that. I would have wondered if I was letting people down, or felt like I owed an explanation for disappearing. Today, I see it a little differently. Life happened. Not in…
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Adult Children of Narcissists - Adverse Childhood Experiences - Boundaries - Breaking the Cycle - cPTSD - cPTSD Healing - Emotional Abuse - Gen X - Generational Trauma - Invalidation - Narcissistic Abuse Recovery - Narcissistic Parent - No Contact - Recovery - Survivor - Trauma
Filial Responsibility and Toxic Parents: The Conversation Nobody Wants to Have
I recently learned about something called filial responsibility laws—laws in some places that can require adult children to contribute to the care or support of aging parents under certain circumstances. The legal details vary, and this isn’t a post about legal advice. What caught my attention was the question these…